When my son was in the seventh grade, he took an electronics course in school. In this class, students learned sophisticated information about building electronic devices. Matt chose as his major project a computer monitor screen. He would build it from a kit purchased for that project. During the course of that semester, we continually encouraged him to do a good job, learn all the "how to's", and create a useful tool for someone's computer. The class sold the projects, then, as a fundraiser. We intentionally bid on his project and secretly purchased it. Then we wrapped it up for Christmas along with the other components of a new computer. To his surprise, on Christmas morning he received the new computer he wanted for Christmas, along with his own monitor.

Besides our desire to encourage Matt, we purchased his monitor hoping to create an intentional family moment. It worked; we had a lively exchange about pride of workmanship and learning by doing. Matt agreed, from his experience, that a worker should always give his best, as if the item were going to be his own -- because it just might be. We still have the monitor, and it still shows his careful workmanship.

If capturing and creating family moments with our children is the key to influencing their lives, then we must take action now. For most parents, making an impression fails not because of missing desire, BUT a missing plan. This "Getting Personal" will let you evaluate how well you have planned and how to start making plans.

1.) How well have you done at creating intentional and recognizing incidental "family moments" with your family? Rate yourself in the following categories. Grade yourself from one to five for each, circling the appropriate number. Use the following scale:

1 = not at all
2 = rarely
3 = sometimes
4 = often
5 = always

Verbal Impressions - How often do I talk to my children about important, lasting issues? 1 2 3 4 5
Symbolic Impressions - How well does my behavior symbolize my values? 1 2 3 4 5
Visual Impressions - Do I help my children visualize what is true and right? 1 2 3 4 5
Written Impressions - Do I write down the things that are important for my children to understand? 1 2 3 4 5

2.) Identify one thing you can do in the next week to create a family moment in each category.

Verbal Impressions -- In order to "impress" my children through conversation, I will...
Symbolic Impressions -- In order to sybolically reinforce my values, I will...
Written Impressions -- In order to record my values for my children, I will...

3.) Identify occasions in the past week when you missed an opportunity to capitalize upon an incidental family moment in your home.

When __(describe incident)__ occurred, I should have __(describe action)__ in order to impress __(describe value)__ upon my family.

Those who walk through this little exercise on a regular basis will become more aware and disciplined in their efforts to impress their children.

In the next e-newsletter, we'll talk about giving a great heritage to your children, even if you didn't receive a very good one.

Adapted from Your Heritage by J. Otis Ledbetter & Kurt Bruner.  All rights reserved.  HeritageBuilders.com